Wanting What We Want

A Brooklyn brownstoneI realized lately that I spend a lot of time trying to convince myself that I don’t want what I actually want.

“You can’t want that, it’s too expensive.”

“That’s unrealistic – stop wanting it.”

Well, what good does that do?? Sublimating my desires doesn’t rid me of them. No matter how high-minded my counsel to myself – I cannot stop myself from wanting what I want.

I want to not live in this apartment anymore. I want to live in a cozy apartment in a brownstone*, not this modern cookie cutter box. I want a view that charms me. I want to redecorate the bedroom and get a duvet cover that doesn’t attract and display dog hair like some sort of prize. I want a couch that isn’t a piece of shit from Jennifer Convertibles. I want a dining table made from reclaimed wood like the one we had in DC before we sold so many of our beautiful things to move to New York. 

I want to find a way to write this blog for a living.

There. That’s what I want.

Is it so outrageous?

What do you want? As the Spice Girls might say… what do you really really want? (Sorry, I couldn’t resist.)

(*Truth be told, what I really really want is an artist’s cottage — a bungalow by the sea, or somewhere beautiful in nature. But for as long as we’re in New York… a cozy brownstone apartment will do nicely, thank you very much.)

Photo by Ann Althouse on Flickr



2 thoughts on “Wanting What We Want

  1. To quote the Rolling Stones (a vastly superior act in my mind), "You can't always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need."


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